The Queen was in a foul mood. Somebody had the nerve to misuse a semicolon in a footnote. The Queen was screaming for blood. She called for sacrifice. The chambering pen delivered.
So... a baby gorilla was sent, all wide-eyed innocence, no bloody idea of what lay ahead. As soon as he entered the Queen's chambers, she began screaming "Off with his head! Off with his head!" (or something that sounded like that... Wahbert relies on guesswork at times) The baby gorilla, being quite distraught, wrung his hands in hopeless defeat and fell upon his knees, imploring the Queen thus, "Please don't lose your temper" (of these words Wahbert was sure, she heard it from the gorilla).
Miraculously, the baby gorilla's doleful voice and bambi eyes must have struck a chord with the Queen. For not only did she pardon his existence, the sacrifice was called off and the gorilla got invited to lunch to boot.
The rest of the people in the World of Wahbert, staring in utter disbelief (and feeling quite cheated of the carnage they were anticipating) wondered where they went wrong. Five little words that could have saved some of them from years of the Queen's torture. Then again, lacking gangly arms, pink bottoms and carpets for skin.... they probably would not have gotten away with it. Oh well.
Friday, January 07, 2005
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